Why is Uncertainty so Difficult?

Good afternoon, today I am writing about a topic that I know a lot of people struggle with from time to time, I know for a fact that many people waste months and even years wasting their precious time hoping and waiting for things to change.  Perhaps, waiting for the day they meet their so-called "soulmate" or for the day they are done with college or for that ex-boyfriend of the past to come back or maybe the company they work at has to decide on who to lay-off and you are not sure if it's you.  It is always true that we human beings try to do anything in our power to stop life from happening at times, if it doesn't unfold the way we want it to or expect, we try so hard to control it.  Thinking that we somehow have the power.  We think that if we just try hard enough that things will work out exactly the way we want them to.  Thus, this belief is downloaded into our subconscious mind and we find that we are not behaving the way we actually want to behave.  Additionally, this is from the belief that we installed unconsciously into our minds, through repetition and consistency that somehow we can control things outside of us.  I know I have believed this for a very long time.  This very belief is one of the most dangerous mindsets one can have.  Because it leaves you fighting with life and when you are fighting with life, there is resistance and when there is resistance there can't be peace.  One cannot expect to flourish in the Now if all they are consumed with is: "What is going to happen in the future?"  This is because eventually down the road you will become so tired of trying to prevent things from happening and trying to create life the way you want it to be, you leave yourself with a closed heart.  Because you are trying to create life and make it the way you want it to be you will never be happy in the present.  You will never be happy in the present because your mind is always either too far left in the past, or too far right, into the future.  I know I always hated hearing from people in my life "Just let it go," but it wasn't until now that I got to explore that meaning within myself.  The philosophy that I have taken away from that is that regardless of one's thoughts that life will happen in spite of what they say.  You could be separated from your husband and think "He is never going to come back and he'll never apologize for his mistakes."  Then the next day or two, he could call you out of the blue to tell you how sorry he is and that he wants to come back home.  My point with this little anecdote, is can we really ever truly, trust that stinking voice inside our head?  No, we can't.  I mean sure we have no way of fact-checking it which makes it so much harder to ward it off but most of the time it is wrong, steering you in the wrong direction.  It may tell you that it is 100% right, but it isn't.  One thing I have learned throughout my spiritual journey, is that the world really has little to do with you or your thoughts, because really if something is meant to happen, it will happen according to the the laws of nature behind all that unfolds, in it's own time and when it is meant to.  These laws were set many years ago and they are inexplicable and far out of our control.  Just like in the first verse of the Tao where Lao Tzu does discuss that there are forces outside of us that operate outside of our control, he says that the Tao or these "universal forces" cannot be named because many times we try to derive meaning to things but to understand the reason behind all that unfolds is to accept not understanding:

The Tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao.  The name that can be named is not the eternal name.  The Tao is both named and nameless.  As nameless it is the origin of all things; as named it is the Mother of 10,000 things.

I chose this verse because of how it illustrates this very principle of not always being able to understand things and why they happen.  Before ongoing my spiritual journey, I was not in a good place, I tried to create an idealized version of life and put it into place, but we cannot force something that doesn't wanna be.  I was emotionally reactive all of the time, never being happy with how I acted out of my subconscious "programs" or "beliefs."  I would always try to figure out why people made the decisions that they made and would believe each and every time that it had to do with me and something that I did to them.  Really this is an illusion, and this illusion is a symptom.  A symptom of codependency.  I would try to lean on others for strength to dig me out of a dark hole I had fallen into repeatedly, but really the only strength that I needed was within me all along.  It was just a matter of discovering it and spending time alone to assess what my goals are in life and what I really wanted to manifest.  The dream I had been living was not the kind of dream I had really wanted to manifest, but I fell into the cobwebs of this fictitious and fantasized dream because it was the only thing that seemed good.  To get through pain, we must go through it.  It is only then that we really learn who we are.  Initially, with the quote above I wanted to emphasize that divinity is something beyond our human understanding, it cannot be broken down into a single term or even categories.  It is a wholly part of our existence that we might never fully understand.  When we cease to fixate and attach onto the small things in life like the thoughts running through the mental field and material objects we want to possess, it is then that we are able to touch upon the mystery that lies at the heart of life.  I will be writing more on this topic as we go along.

Om Shanti Shanti Shanti

Julia

#spiritualawakening #spirirtualevolution #fearoftheunknown